The Solo Diner

I’ve written before about traveling solo and how invigorating (and, I think, necessary) it is. But what about going solo in the city where you live?

I am a classic introvert. I like people and I like seeing friends, but it exhausts me. Unless something major is happening, I try to stick to about one “thing” with people each weekend. This weekend I’m meeting a friend for a film and dinner and next week I’m going to a happy hour party for a friend’s new job. The rest of the time, I have “me” time.

During the majority of the week, I’m surrounded by people and my time is not really my own. But on weekends I tend to wander around on my own, and I like it that way. I can pick the films I want to see, the coffee shops where I hang out and read and the restaurants where I eat.

I celebrated my raise with a solo dinner at Oyamel. Probably once every other month or so I go to The Coupe and sit and have a meal at the bar. Ted’s Bulletin on 14th? Great solo bar breakfasts. I also did a Restaurant Week lunch last weekend at The Source. It’s just what I do, and it’s great.

I never got the point of being embarrassed or scared of doing things alone. I think it might be a combination of my introversion and being an only child. I’ve always been self-sufficient and have never relied on finding other people to do things with. Do I like going out with friends, yes. Am I mentally exhausted after, also yes. I’d miss out on a lot of experiences, things I want to do, if I only ever did them when I could coordinate with other people.

So make that solo dinner reservation without fear. Just maybe bring a book.

Advertisements

Please don’t be That Guy on Yelp

According to my Yelp profile, I am on my second year of being Elite in the Washington, D.C., area. I like Yelp because it combines two of my favorite things: writing and dining out. While I use Yelp mainly for fun and to keep track of where I’ve been, I understand that it carries weight in many places.

I always write my reviews in good faith, and I’ve written them for a number of popular D.C.-area restaurants (including Rasika, Graffiato, Jaleo and Founding Farmers), as well as places in Kansas City, Boston, the UK and Paris. I try to write them as soon as possible after my experience, so the information is fresh and accurate.

Attempting to leverage my so-called Elite status to get additional swag, whether it be perks, better service or freebies, has never crossed my mind. For one thing, I can’t imagine the inflated sense of self-worth necessary to do that. For another, I’m still a journalist who believes, like any good professional critic, that a review is only worthwhile if you’re treated like everyone else. For a third, I’m not a scummy human being.

Jezebel today shared a story about a guy who’s setting up a business plan that revolves around, more or less, extorting businesses based on him being a reviewer for sites like Yelp and TripAdvisor. (The original Los Angeles Times stories is behind a paywall, sorry!) He’s distributing the “ReviewerCard,” the idea being that if you flash it and promise to give a good review, businesses will offer discounts, extras and the like. He brags about getting discounted hotel rates by promising to give a good review — the logical conclusion and underlying threat, real or not, being that if he doesn’t get preferential treatment, he’ll write a bad review. The actual quality of the business does not seem to play a role in his reviews; it’s what he can get out of it for himself.

After reading the story, I mostly hoped that Yelp would catch wind of it and disable his account. Professional critics take great pains to avoid being recognized or getting preferential treatment, because they want their experience to mirror that of a regular person’s as much as possible. The idea of New York Times or Washington Post writers telling the hostess that they’re critics, so that fromage plate better be on the house if you know what I mean, is unfathomable. What this guy is selling as “win-win” is really just him being greedy.

Enjoy sites like Yelp for what they are — something that is supposed to be fun, informative and social. Don’t be a tacky egotist who believes that being Elite entitles you to $25 off your bill or whatever.

Going out!

My mother told me before I left not to spend all of my time in my room. I have the past couple of nights, mostly because I’ve been getting over a head cold and the weather’s been lousy.

But tonight I went on a sort of campus pub crawl (yes, we have bars on campus, because we’re awesome). I thought I’d tell you a little about my new friends and our night out.

Hannah, Rachel and Deborah

Hannah, Rachel and Deborah

First there’s Deborah. She’s a PhD student in genetics, and very perky, bubbly and outgoing. She’s shorter than I am but really feisty. She’s also a quiz fanatic, like me, so we sort of bonded over that immediately.

Second is Hannah, who’s doing an LLM in law. She’s like me in that she’s quiet until you get to know her, but talkative and friendly once you do. She also studied at Kent as an undergrad, so she’s sort of our guide around campus and good to get dirt on what to do around town.

Finally there’s Rachel. She’s doing a PhD in biodiversity. She’s outgoing and funny, but on the serious side I can tell she’s serious about her work and plans to study hard.

All three of them are English.

Tonight I had dinner at Origins, the bar in Darwin College (Origins, get it?), with Rachel, Deborah and one of Deborah’s visiting friends. Origins specializes in Tex-Mex type stuff like nachos, quesadillas and fajitas, and also has snack foods and burgers. I had a burger, Rachel had Cajun chicken in a skillet and the other two had chicken wraps. It has kind of a sports bar-meets-modern-restaurant feel, with lots of booths, pool tables and TVs. It has a bright orange/yellow color palate, which is cool.

After that, we headed to Gulbenkian’s bar and cafe (Gulbenkian’s is the campus theatre/cinema, with a large cafe), which had a cocktail night on. We met up with Hannah and one of the other guys from Woolf, who’s from Germany. The drinks were still kind of pricey, so we headed over to Mungo’s, a place in Eliot College that’s designed like a euro nightclub type place. I’m told they have great burgers and sandwiches during the day (a third major cafe on campus, K-Bar, in Keynes College, does mostly pizza, while Dolche Vita, also in Keynes, does more European-Asian fusion and coffee drinks). Rutherford College has a bar owned and operated by the student union; the aforementioned bars/cafes are operated by university hospitality.

After a couple of drinks in Mungo’s, where the dance music made it kind of loud, we walked over to Park Wood, which is a residential neighborhood on the other side of campus for undergrads, and went to Woody’s, a student bar/pub owned by the student union. We watched a game of pool, chatted and had another drink before walking back to Woolf. All in all, a fun night out and reasonably inexpensive — about £10 total for dinner and drinks from 7:30 to midnight.

Tomorrow I’m going into the city centre to see “The Town” at the Odeon Cinema and appraise the theatre. I might look at WHSmith for some work folders for classes, which start Tuesday for me. We might do something tomorrow night, I’m not sure. Sunday afternoon is the trip to Leeds Castle, and Sunday night is a pub quiz in K-Bar. Monday’s curry night at the Gulbenkian and a quiz night at a pub in town, and Tuesday I’m attending an Amnesty International meeting. Current Affairs meets on Thursday evenings, and I may have to alternate between pub nights and society meetings for the American society, as it looks like both will fall on Mondays (even though there are other pub quizzes throughout the week).

I’ve also decided to try out Anglican services at Keynes Chapel on Sundays, starting next week (can’t go this week because of the castle tour). The services all include lunch afterward, and I’m kind of curious about the Anglican set-up. It’s also been ages since I’ve had any sort of Communion. The fellowship organizes a lot of activities during the term, and this term’s trips include a day visit to Bodiam Castle, built during the reign of Richard II (yeah, him again) and the small parish town of Rye, as well as a longer holiday in Bruges, Belgium in November.

So there you have it. Not even here a week!

P.S. By far the most important details of the night were that I earned my first mayorship on Foursquare (I’m “mayor” of Origins now) and I got another badge — the “Crunked” badge for four or more check-ins in one might. Mummy must be so proud.